I wish

It was the day in the month of August, when it was raining outside and I was alone at home sitting besides the window watching each drop as they passed by, some of `em declining diagonally sticking to the glass. It reminded me of the day way back in school, raining very similar to the present day, and that bunch of girls having the photo-session in front of the shopping complex. It was the first time when I saw her in a black top, green capris and almost transparent flat sleepers, under a pink umbrella. She had khol in her eyes which was supposed to be resistant to moisture with her hair loose and wet. Her wide, open, perforated smile made me sit by that window with thoughts flowing all around.....



I wish
I were a drop falling from the clouds,
Passing through each altitude of attitude
To its ultimate ground zero.

I wish
I were a snail crawling up a rough trunk,
Fetching each of the ups and downs
Conquering every single tremble.

I wish
I were a stone lying at the edge of the road,
Watching each footstep, numbly
As the seasons change their colours.

I wish
I were one of the legs of the table,
Always standing still with the other beside
Confronting each of the charging tonnage.

I wish
I were a note of the Sargam
Incomplete without the rest of `em
Bringing smiles each time I shiver.

I wish
I were possessing all these roles concurrently,
I wish
I were in love.

Its almost 5 years now since then, I still retrospect those eyes dipped in that thick layer of khol and I regret having that first glimpse of her way back in the school.

Renaissance

How he gay-ed

It was a hot and windy evening when Cwong woke up astonishingly from his routined 2 O`clock sleep after a heavy stuffed lunch in the Bhawan`s mess mess, bunking the afternoon classes. It sometimes makes me think why does he even ask every now and then, the reason of people calling him a Tondu. His immediate words were, "abe, maine bhoot dekha". Coincidently it was that 57 year old, white haired, short, pot bellied young man`s class having a very thin moustache which was still black. So more than 80% Janta was not in that monotonous class as that fellow never took attendence. He seemed no less than a lady who`d just delivered a baby.

His description was something like this, ''There was a face outside the window next to the door, with red glittering eyes and blood drooling out of its mouth. The face was attached to no body, instead it was floating over blood. I had closed the left sideboard of the wide window and had left the right one open, but now it`s just the reverse way. I`d been listening to the song Writtten in the stars (Greenday), and now when I woke up ........''.

We searched for that unapprehended, unascertained, uncharted, unrevealed thing starting right from the underside of his bed, all through the pathways, even inside the water-cooler, over his window-shed, found two suspicious pigeons but to our surprise, their heads were intact and there was not a single sign of blood. Even in this chaotic situation, Cwong never lost his original, accustomed conformation and kept repeating the incident to each and every individual who came along his way, to mess, back from the mess, throughout the stairs, every room he stepped into, even to a senior who met him once in the railway station.

The same evening, when there were 3 metal-heads in his room, having some chill-pill, sharing some fictitious horror stories creating an awkward unwanted environment, listening to some typical numbers, his laptop suddenly switched off automatically. Anticipating for an overheated processor shutdown, I pressed the power button. No response. We kept it upside down to go through a natural cooling process, and gave a try again. But all in vein. Cwong`s expression started to stiffle, as if some haunted spirit had started entering his body.

That night he never showed up even near his room, maintained atleast 30 feet distance, slept in the same couch as mine, kept doing some CENSORED actions all night. The next day, with the first ray of sun, he shifted in with me, same room but different couches this time. He also explained on demand, the CENSORED unconscious actions which he`d been doing since his early teenage whenver he dreamt of something breathe-taking. Now this lappy-less fellow spent all of his daytime, wandering and all of his night-time ........
He moved out only when the Finals arrived for the rescue of the angelic, numb fellow, making him feel like a Renaissance.

PS :: All characters in this post are purely imaginary. Any resemblance of names and/or location is purely coincidental.

When I revisited my birth ....

As the years of my life passed, I realised that Newton had once said very truly, "Everything that goes up must come down". My journey started just from the very moment I was born.

(0) Hey, I`m not out yet.I was sleeping.
(1) I cried.
(2) I spoke.
(3) I walked.
(4) I learnt how to play.
(5) I learnt how to go to school.
(6) I got some people who also just had learnt 'How to go to school'.
(7) We started dreaming a common dream.
(8) We made ours teachers run after us.
(9) We pee-ed together into the school`s front garden.
(10) We made our teachers pay for their local-wooden-scale again and again.
(11) We learnt how to study.
(12) We learnt what to study.
(13) We learnt why to study.
(14) We never studied.
(15) We studied hard to keep our parents` heads up.
(16) We fell in love.
(17) We failed in love.
(18) We got into college.
(19) We played computer games.
(20) We found girls to spend all our money on.
(21) We got ourselves out of those girls` hearts and then from the college.
(22) We dreamt of being a Roadie.
(23) We managed to get a job.
(24) We smiled watching our parents` smile/whisper.
(25) I got married.
(26) Everyone else laughed at me .
(27) I fell in love.
(28) I had a baby.
(29) He cried.
(30) He spoke.
(31) He walked.
(32) He learnt how to play.
(33) He learnt how to go to school.
(34) He got some people who also just had learnt 'How to go to school'.
(35) I had another baby.
(36) She cried.
(37) She spoke.
(38) She walked.
(39) She learnt how to play.
(40) She learnt how to go to school.
(41) She got some people who also just had learnt 'How to go to school'.
(42) I was found out to be a diabetes positive.
(43) I got a Life Insurance plan.
(44) I started believing in God.
(45) He got into the IITs.
(46) He got himself occupied in some Top-Secret projects.

(47)-(60)

I worked hard, got them into good colleges.

Their frequency of talks with us reduced drastically.

They started avoiding us.

Our presence in front of their colleagues embarrassed them then.

I got them married.

I became grandpa.

(60) I got retired.

(61)-(81)

Finally I got some life with my life-partner.

(82) I died.

It is now when I realise that those were the first and the last twenty years of my life which I actually lived. Life resembles a chemical reaction. It has stable ends at both ends. Only the reaction occurs high.

I was young

It was the time
when I was young,
running through the closed hallways,
Shouting.

They used to be only the nights,
when I slept
flying from one planet to the other,
Dreaming.

All during the daylight,
I kept myself occupied,
breaking window-panes, some historical cricket scores.
Bursting some tires out,
leaving that 53 years old kiddo behind,
Screaming.

It was that old, yellow-painted building,
where we all gathered everyday in a familiar colour combination.
Jumping from one desk to the other
Taking some teeth out of ones` mouth,
Banging.

It was the time
when I was young,
storing in every single blessing
from those old age kiddos ,
Smiling.

What happens

When an IITan tries to clean up his/her room :-

If the IITan is a guy :-

(1)First of all he appreciates this noble idea which just arrived his and only his mind.

(2)He then starts singing 'jai ganesh, jai ganesh, jai ganesh deva...' followed by 'humko itni shakti dena....'.

(3)He starts a chain of thanksgiving to all his closed ones who inspired him to take such a great step.

(4)This is the moment since the extreme past when his eyes donate some tears.You cann`t imagine how happy is he at this point.

(5)Listening to 'wake me up.... (greenday)' , he starts enjoying a real life nap when somebody comes and reminds him of his original missison for the day.

(6)He expresses his gratitude towards this kind-hearted fellow by addressing him a '*&&$^&*#)!^&#^#('.

(7)He then performs his sub-mission of finding a broom anywhere in the hostel.

(8)Failing to do so he goes & gets one from the market thinking of those '&^!&**^)#$' words all along his way up and down. This took him some 2 hrs and 45 mins.

(9)He spends only 30 mins thinking where to start from.

(10)He finishes his original mission just within 2 hrs and 17 mins and fortunately got some of what people call important stuff--

• A titan watch (worth Rs 1275/-)
• A 100 rupee note (worth Rs 100/-)
• 12 ten rupee notes (worth Rs 120/-)
• chillhar coins (worth Rs 73/-)
• 12th board original Mark-Sheet (some things money cann`t buy, for everything else.....)
• 5 packs of Goldflake though partially filled (worth two days)
• 4 ATM cards of which only one was his.
• 3 socks each of a different shade of which none was his.
• The Associate (A novel by John Grisham)
• Nokia N95 (He is using RIM CDMA these days)
• A calculator (worth Rs 500/-)
• Logitech speakers (while he kept shouting all these days "iski awaaz itni kam kyun ho gayi hai " )
• some raddi (worth Rs 142/-)

Now after he`s all done with his mission, he analyses the losess as time and the gains in terms of monetary profits.He sorts out that getting the mission done by an assistant (jhaadu waale bhaiya) giving him a sum of Rs 30/-, talking some politics accompanied by some masala-maar-ke campus gossip would have been far more worthy. Once again starting his chain of thanksgiving to all his inspirational idols, dedicating those noble, kind '&**!%^#%%(#($' words and realising those 6 hrs 43 mins of workout on a weekend, he goes to sleep.

If the IITan is NOT a guy :-

(1)As a part of her usual routine, she picks up the broom leaning against the corner besides her bed.

(2)She starts the job from right under her study-cum-make up table.

(3)She finishes within 6 mins (including a revision so that not a single inch is left untouched).

(4)Fortunately she located some of the disorders that made her conscience act steadily:-

• 1 pen ka dhakkan lying under her 2-in-1 table.
• 1 sudoku cutting from TOI on her table.
• One of her 4 pair of sandals not placed parallelly.
• 1 empty pack of maggi noodles.
• 4 gms of dust.

After she`s all done, she takes a bath (no doubt using her own bucket and stuffs), spends a little 45 mins in front of her 2-in-1 table holding a mirror (which is again her own property), using some more stuffs (difficult to differentiate), some of which I had mugged up while being in a party hosted by a female friend and to my luck, sat between 5 ladies. At last, after conducting a poll of how-she-looks among 12 active and regular participants including her DD, she makes her way to the main gate of the girls hostel where she sets her original mission of extracting the maximum out of the guy who thinks he`s in love, waiting outside, desperately.

PS :: One guy asked me "why are they even referred to as she/her ?"

He suggested some better words like 'not-he/not-him' !!

Once upon a time

Once upon a time there happened to be a guy who lived somewhere in the untamed region of middle India, concealed and insensible, that some of the gifted individuals of north india, who surprisingly happened to be what people called CBSE-district-toppers of their times, had never heard of the state to which this place belonged. At an age when he couldn`t play his all time favourite game, cricket, his routined timepass was to visit his one of the neighbouring aunty`s (kaki-ma`s) place when all the uncles (kaku`s) were out for work, fortunately all headed for a single destination (so their common back-home-timing was known). It was one lazy night, the clock on his, what people say, study table showing 2:55 AM, when history just tickled through his thoughtless mind.

He rolled back his eyes 12 years past, where he saw the backyard of a quarter which resided at the corner of the road which headed towards the main shopping complex (main enough to have atleast a hair-cut), That road contained numerous quarters, brimming out people each evening. The same corner was accompanied by a badiminton court followed by a quiet awkward shaped playground having two working night lamps, which was supposed to be the only one of its kind then. It was the court where all those historical cricket matches used to be played with all those gossiping aunties as very delighted spectators. The playground was used as a get-together venue at night, by aunties as a chit-chat point and by kids (age below 5 or above 22) as a regular hang-out place.

He could revive the evenings, which used to make him laugh, no doubt donating tears sometimes. Suddenly that face appeared before his eyes that once taught him how to laugh. To his surprise he remembered every single stretch, every single crease, every single depression of that character.

(1) The dimples in each of her cheeks.
(2) The shoulders hopping every time she laughed.
(3) The shoulders hopping exactly the same way every time her eyes overflowed.
(4) The narrow neck occasionally made him think how she was able to take enough of the oxygen.

(5) Her deep, watery, shining eyes with quiet dense black eyelashes.
(6) A perfect zero-wrinkle face, even when she was or seemed to be what people say, angry.
(7) The shoulder length hair slightly curly at the bottom.
(8) Legs resembling broomsticks, he wondered how she managed to run that fast then.
(9) Her presence of mind to use her nails and teeth efficiently each time he used to pick her teddy up. Though he wonder if that was a teddy.

(10) Such a high-pitch voice that he sometimes thought of her being an X-man.
(11) She never tried anything beyond those knee-lenght frocks with flowers printed all over. All credits goes to her mum.

The guy had a recent thought then, whether he was dreaming ! Then his common sense told him that he couldn`t write a blog, sleeping. But as soon as he was out of history he wondered "Was it really 12 years !!".

बस एक लम्हे का झगडा था

Someone just called ......

चाहते तो रुक सकते थे उस दिन
कमी रह गयी तो बस सिर्फ,
कुछ अल्फाजों की
बस एक बार नज़रें मिलाने की,

सोच और सांस एक हुआ करते थे कभी
साथ उठते थे ,साथ चलते थे कदम,
आखों की हलचल सारी कहानी बयां कर दिया करती थी
सुकून मिलता था रूह को
सिर्फ इतनी सी ही थी शब्दों की अहमियत,

अचानक मौसम ने कुछ ऐसा रुख बदला
आसमां भी सर पर भारी लगने लगा,
रास्ता भी कुछ धुंधला सा लगने लगा था
देखते ही देखते काले पड़ने लगे थे वो दिन

एक-एक लव्ज़ अब
शतरंज के प्यादों की तरह लगने लगा था,
भले ही छोटे और आसान होते थे
पर हर तरफ से काटने को दौड़ते

हर एक नज़र अब
मन की तस्वीर को तोड़ जाती थी,
जैसे कांच टूटता है
हर एक टुकड़े में वो साहिल नज़र आता था
जिसके सपने साथ-साथ देखे थे कभी

आंसू तो थे पलकों पर उनके
बस इस बार साथ बह ना सके,
बस एक लम्हे का झगडा था वो
चाहते तो रुक सकते थे उस दिन !

ज़माना था ....

ज़माना था जब हम नवाब हुआ करते थे

रिक्शे पर बैठकर स्कूल जाया करते थे,

रथ पर हमारे साथ चार मंत्री और चला करते थे

यात्रा के दौरान भोजन सम्बन्धी राजनीति किया करते थे !

सूर्यदेव की पहली आवाज़ के साथ उठा दिए जाते थे

सोचा करते थे,

सूरज मामू के बाकी कार्यों के विषय में

जिन्हें त्यागकर वो अपना सारा ध्यान मुझपर लगाया करते थे !

ज़माना था जब हम नवाब हुआ करते थे

गुसलखाने से भी इंतज़ार करवाया करते थे

नाश्ते में colgate लिया करते थे,

और ये नाश्ता पूरे 20 मिनट तक किया करते थे !

आश्चर्य की बात तो ये थी कि

तब हम रोज़ नहाया करते थे,

शान से वर्दी धारण कर

माताश्री को भगाया करते थे !

पकडे जाने पर TV के सामने बैठकर चुपचाप

दूसरी बार नाश्ता करते थे,

TV देखना जारी रहता था तब

पिताश्री पधारते थे !

सामने आकर हाथ बांधकर खड़े हो जाते थे

तब हम चुपचाप TV बंद कर देते थे,

आदत तो हमें पड़ ही चुकी थी

मार तो हम हर सुबह खाते थे !

रोते रोते जूते घिसते थे

पिताश्री फिर आकर खड़े हो जाते थे,

सच मानिए, हम तुंरत ही रोना बंद कर देते थे

और जाकर अपना बस्ता सजाते थे !

जब हमारा सारथी सड़क पर खड़े होकर चीखता था

तब हम शान से बस्ता ले जा कर उसे थमा देते थे,

आखिर तब हम नवाब हुआ करते थे

रिक्शे से स्कूल जाया करते थे !

A moment for thoughts

ये ख्याल आता है .......


बिछौने के बगल में कोने की दिवार की टपकती छत को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

गर्मियों में उस टूटे हुए पुल को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

पुलिस की वर्दी में छिपे हुए उस चोर को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

फुटपाथ पर सोते हुए उस विशाल सेना को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

घर के रोज़-रोज़ के झगडों को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

ज़िन्दगी के बीच सफ़र में उस बढे हुए हाथ को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

दर-दर की ठोकरें खाते अपनों के उन नम पलकों को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

अपने बीच ही उस महकते बचपन को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

दूसरों के लिए धड़कने वाले उस दिल को देखकर
ये ख्याल आता है,

वैसे तो ज़िन्दगी गुजारने के लिए बहुत लम्बी है
पर हार कर भी जीने वाले उस रूह को देखकर,
ये ख्याल आता है,
कि कहीं देर ना हो जाए !!

सोच कभी

कुछ लोग दूर रहकर भी पास थे मेरे .....

सोच कभी
उन लम्हों को जो कभी हसीं हुआ करते थे;
पलकों को नम कर दिया करते थे,
बैठे बैठे किसी अनजाने दुनिया की सैर करा दिया करते थे !

सोच कभी
उस उम्र को जो मासूम हुआ करती थी;
यार अपने और हम उनके हुआ करते थे,
ज़मीन में रहकर भी आसमां में उड़ा करते थे !

सोच कभी
उन आदर्शों को जो शायद ही हम माना करते थे;
उन नियमों को जो हम हँसते हँसते टाल दिया करते थे,
जो मात्र आने के लिए और फिर जाने के लिए हुआ करते थे !

आज बारी है ज़िन्दगी को मुड़कर देखने की
जो खो दिया है उन रिश्तों को खोज निकालने की;
अपनों के पास वापस आने की,
माफ़ी मांगने की !!

Show off

These are some of our future representatives :: -

(1) Abhinav :: saale cp sutta le ke aa na
(2) Akshay :: IMG is more important than CG
(3) Anirudh :: Tum to yaar galat hi ilzaam laga rahe ho, maine kiya hi kya hai, accha tu bata
(4) Chaitali :: Main try karungi, main dukhi nahi karungi aur kutte-kamine nahi bolungi.
(5) chandra prakash :: Abe ab to interest hi hat gaya hai.....shaadi-shuda aadmi hun
(6) Divij :: The pants should never be above the "10 cms mark " below the hips
(7) Gurdeep :: He is gurdeep . Nothing else is needed
(8) Harsh :: Hamaare bhopal mein na .......
(9) Indroneil :: He`s already got a spouse >> His computer ! I love pink. Abe darvaaza band kar yaar

(10) Jatin :: Jatin "y cant i study" has serially kissed Piyali Purkait in the cafeteria 22 times and scored 2300 kisspoints (via Serial kisser)
[because they are damn close]

(11) Manoj:: Abe last time hamne sirf 3 peg hi maare the
(12) Naveen :: Abe saale aukat mein reh.
(13) Prashanth :: kya re >> most frustrated !
(14) Pratik :: oye 10 rupaye de naa , chal gabbar chai maar ke aate hain
(15) Rashmi :: Sir ye kya hai , ye kyun hai , isse kya hota hai
(16) Ravi :: arre nai bai , arre kya bai ???
(17) Sahil :: The fone guy ! abe baat kar raha hun
(18) Saikat :: The fattebaaj !
(19) Sandeep :: Abe dekh , Item Aunty !

(20) Sankalp :: Abe main nahi aa raha class , proxy maar dena .
Abe mess mein kya bana hai , canteen chal raha hai kya

(21) Shaifali :: chalo class mein ek to sensible ladka hai.
(22) Shivang :: pata hai ek baar hum Orchha gaye the , tab naa %#^%#%^%)()(^%^%#% ......
aur dost ne naa ......*&%^&%^$^&*&&^&^ ......
aur aaj AOE mein na .......*(&(&^&#%^%#*)()#(*((#()* .......
aur......... *&(*^&#^&*^#(*&#^&*^*#(*& .........

(23) Siddhika :: bhaiya ek chanaa-masala ,ek shaahi panner , ek raita , aur stuffed naan . Baaki main-course ke liye 15-20 min baad aana .
(24) Tanuj :: Abe sir nahi aa rahe , 5 min ho gaye , chalo vaapas chalte hain.
(25) Vyom :: Tumhe ladki nahi milenge aur jo honge vo bhi chale jaayenge.
(26) Vinod :: I love my roomie .
(27) Vignesh :: kya re , Phod daalega tereko .
(28) Rajpal :: raj9-double jeero-6 at gmail dod com